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Автор Алексей Гринь
- апреля 19, 2009, 14:25Цитата: "Aleksey" отСпасибо, запомнил.
гавно по-литовски
Автор Aleksey
- апреля 19, 2009, 14:17гавно по-литовски, классика есть классика Уважаемый, сейчас всё попсовое..
Автор dagege
- апреля 18, 2009, 14:31Что такое šudas?
Автор dagege
- апреля 18, 2009, 14:31Для меня "классический" ни о чём не говорит. Бывает классическое, а муть ещё та. Для меня важна идея, даже не в "классическом".
Автор Aleksey
- апреля 18, 2009, 11:45Был бы фЫльм классическим - отлично, теперешние фЫльмы - šudas.. может 0,00001% из них нормальные 
Автор dagege
- апреля 17, 2009, 08:03Aleksey, Муза - не фильм. Муза - идея фильма. Сие есть не одинаково.
Автор Aleksey
- апреля 16, 2009, 22:00Нет плавности мысли, переход идей сложновато соединить.. Лично я попытался б написать что-нибудь по-короче - скелет идей, после, развить их в более высоком поэтическом стиле.. ну и с правильным использованием грамматики. Муза - фильм, не самая лучшая комбинация для поэзии.. Но это личное моё мнение..
Автор dagege
- апреля 16, 2009, 19:25Aleksey, This poetic text (let it be said like that) was ispired after watching "Wanted" movie, so I can't see here any "blurry" meaning.
Автор Aleksey
- апреля 16, 2009, 13:12Prose is easier to edit, poetic texts are too hard for me for now 
it's an exaggeration of your ideas/thoughts, either you stick to "i fell myself so different" or "kinda", 'kinda' is ~50/50, 'so' is 100%;
Another fingers will never touch you
All my days are the same and bore
I killed my friends and I said them: "fuck you",
So I cannot see them anymore.
Another - other; all my days - my days are all the same/are same and boring; I've killed my friends and said to them: "Fuck you" (better this one..); there can't be two negations in one sentence.
Foolish days are everyday,
Foolish choices to choose the one,
Foolish gatherings - it's not your blame,
I feel the same, but I won't fall down.
Breaking rules and changing times,
It's not mistakes that I have made,
I found the reasons and many bounds,
But still I'm here, it's all the same.
It doesn't sound right to me :O foolish is overused and the meaning of the stanza is blurry and can't be linked to 1st stanza.
You ought to use Thesaurus more..
Overall I think that these texts (far from poetic..) are rather ugly, modernism in literature can be very stupid :p
it's an exaggeration of your ideas/thoughts, either you stick to "i fell myself so different" or "kinda", 'kinda' is ~50/50, 'so' is 100%;
Another fingers will never touch you
All my days are the same and bore
I killed my friends and I said them: "fuck you",
So I cannot see them anymore.
Another - other; all my days - my days are all the same/are same and boring; I've killed my friends and said to them: "Fuck you" (better this one..); there can't be two negations in one sentence.
Foolish days are everyday,
Foolish choices to choose the one,
Foolish gatherings - it's not your blame,
I feel the same, but I won't fall down.
Breaking rules and changing times,
It's not mistakes that I have made,
I found the reasons and many bounds,
But still I'm here, it's all the same.
It doesn't sound right to me :O foolish is overused and the meaning of the stanza is blurry and can't be linked to 1st stanza.
You ought to use Thesaurus more..
Overall I think that these texts (far from poetic..) are rather ugly, modernism in literature can be very stupid :p
Автор dagege
- апреля 15, 2009, 18:02But can I say: "I feel myself so kinda different" instead of "I feel myself some kinda different"?